We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize