This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
We're using joints as your birthday candles
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I supernannyed him into submission
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
