Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
