their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize