And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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