This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
