I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
My ass is underappreciated
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Randomize