what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
