im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
