It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize