the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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