you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Randomize