We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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