Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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