Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize