either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
