im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
