lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
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