I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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