Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
