Are we in a gay sports bar?
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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