They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
