I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
