just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize