she takes plan B like it's going out of style
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Randomize
