Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize