And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Randomize
