I would go down on you faster than GM stock
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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