PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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