Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Randomize
