if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
