don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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