She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Randomize