i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
