But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Randomize
