I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I have already put on my inside pants.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize