sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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