Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I just googled if crying burns calories
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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