Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
