All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
