I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Let's paint friendship bongs
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
