She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
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