found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
