my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Randomize
