when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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