Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
