And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
