I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Randomize
