don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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