what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
