In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize
